#1 Get into a squat, with you right foot diagonally behind your left. Keep your left arm behind your back, right arm loosely in front of you Use these eleven dance moves the next time you need to lure an erumpent into your suitcase.#2 Give your best mating call. Think “Cock-a-doodle-doo,” but without the consonants. #3 Keep eye contact with your partner (this is very important) and make some snorting noises. #4 Lift your right leg up really high, swing it forward with knee bent, and put your foot down in front of you while slightly bowing. Your arms should still be right in front, left behind. #5 Slowly drag your right foot back to its original position, using the outside of your right foot to write a squiggly “S” shape (for sexy, obviously) in the dirt/ground/sand/snow as you go. End with your feet somewhat in ballet 4th position, knees bent. #6 Repeat the right leg lift motion, this time, turning your backside to face your partner. You should land in a deep squat, with both arms are now behind you. Keep snorting. #7 Take a couple chasses to the left, staying in a squat position. Your hands can go to your knees, hips, or stay behind you, as you please. #8 Turn back around to face forward. #9 Throw some more chasses and 180 degree turns in for good measure. Really go at it. The more the better. #10 Then, drop it like it’s hot, and roll on your back before getting back up on your feet. #11 End in a squat again, right hand extended forward lightly. Congratulations! You have successfully wooed an erumpent. To save erumpents, visit ErumpentRescue.com!
1 Comment
Appy
8/20/2021 05:05:53 am
This made me giggle 😳
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